Wednesday, July 9, 2008

letting go.....or trying to...

I'm embarrassed that it's taken me so long to get back to this blog, but it's only evidence that I have been a busy little bee with the upcoming retirement. I plan to give my notice next week on the 15th. With all the planning and preparation I have to admit, when it comes right down to actually doing the deed, it's gets a little scary. Putting one foot ahead of the other I am just moving ahead.

The museum where I'll be doing docent work has issued me an ID card, that's pretty exciting. I was surprised to learn that museums have reciprocity with museums all over the country and the world, so I'll now be able to get in without paying admission, something I will enjoy.

The meditation is moving along and I have really been enjoying Sharon Saltzberg, she gave her last lecture last night so I'll probably see her again in September when she comes back to New York. Letting go has never been easy for me, but I think it will be come easier.

Two individuals from my past that I haven't had contact with for at least five years, I originally cut the relationships off. I reached out to both men. The relationships were powerful for me both in the good register and the bad register. I am pleased that they both responded favorably to meeting for a coffee or lunch . I feel that I have grown, hopefully they have grown too ! It really is not easy to let go of friendships with people that you have history with and that you actually liked. The trick is for me NOT to pick up where we left off but to get beyond that. I met with C.F. for lunch yesterday it went well and I was able to not lose myself or my identity. This is a very good thing, I knew if I couldn't keep my balance, it would be the last time we would have met. I am really glad he now has a partner, who btw I actually met that night at the Sharon Salzberg lecture.(Yes what a small world). I do miss J.P. After my little retirement dinner on August 29th we'll take a weekend together in Providence R.I., it should be fun and a nice change as well as a great way to start my new life.

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